Chivalrous // Expectations // Knight
Before getting into my opinions on chivalry, I would like to explain my appreciation of traditionalism. I am in a sorority and being in a sorority we host social event. Our most recent event was a formal. Being an all girl sorority, it is basically impossible for me to get asked, meaning that in order for me to have a date, I must ask someone. As I have previously discussed, I lack the finesse that normally functioning social creatures have, so asking it awkward and awful. Not only is it hard, but I actually have gotten rejected.
I get bored easily and wonder at boys with their attempts at "honorable intentions". Sometimes I feel like a lost cause. I feel like I am fighting a war, but no one else is in it. I am fighting the war for chivalry. The problem with chivalrous expectations is that they have a tendency to disappoint for reality is far less well-mannered and colorful.I expect things that I have no right to expect and actually cannot really achieve to the standard of my expectations.
I expect to be wooed. Coming from a girl like me, this is saying a lot. I am the girl who prefers to open her own doors and likes for the men to go first (though that is simply because men should be leading me). However, I want to feel wanted and more than that, I want to be liked and treated like a princess.
I expect to be told the truth. Part of being a true gentleman is protecting the maiden's heart even when it hurts him. This means if him and his girlfriend of two years broke-up and he isn't ready to get into a new relationship, he needs to tell her. This means that if there are other girls he calls babe that she deserves to know. This means if he is not interested, he needs to tell her and not have her fall for his perfection while ignoring his flaws. This means if there are other girls, he needs to tell her.
I expect to be exclusive. I said that part of being a gentleman is telling her if there are other girls, but in truth, chivalry is a concept based on monogamy. There was a singular knight courting one girl. If it didn't work out, then he may pursue another, but not until then. This is something I have to work on: being exclusive. I'm not talking about in relationships, that is a given. I am talking about in pursing relationships. I am talking about the talking phase. I am talking about the hanging out phase. All the pre-dating dancing should be exclusive.
I expect---
I don't want to have to fight for his attention. I want to feel wanted. I want to be pursued and I want for him to love the Lord more than he will ever love me. I expect him to guard my heart by stating his intentions clearly. I expect--- to not have to fight.
Sure these expectations are high and somewhat unrealistic, but I will stick to them. I have a hope for the revival of chivalry. After a few months in Houston, I realize that the Southern gentleman still lives, but he's imperfect and despite the fact that he is a "perfect gentleman" he has a tendency to drink too much, make terrible decisions, treat other men with contempt, and swear a little too much for my taste. I understand the chivalry has it's flaws too and my romantic notions of it will probably be crushed into a pulp if I ever actually see full-blown chivalry enacted, nevertheless, I hold out hope that chivalry is not dead. I hold out hope for a knight in shining armor.
I get bored easily and wonder at boys with their attempts at "honorable intentions". Sometimes I feel like a lost cause. I feel like I am fighting a war, but no one else is in it. I am fighting the war for chivalry. The problem with chivalrous expectations is that they have a tendency to disappoint for reality is far less well-mannered and colorful.I expect things that I have no right to expect and actually cannot really achieve to the standard of my expectations.
I expect to be wooed. Coming from a girl like me, this is saying a lot. I am the girl who prefers to open her own doors and likes for the men to go first (though that is simply because men should be leading me). However, I want to feel wanted and more than that, I want to be liked and treated like a princess.
I expect to be told the truth. Part of being a true gentleman is protecting the maiden's heart even when it hurts him. This means if him and his girlfriend of two years broke-up and he isn't ready to get into a new relationship, he needs to tell her. This means that if there are other girls he calls babe that she deserves to know. This means if he is not interested, he needs to tell her and not have her fall for his perfection while ignoring his flaws. This means if there are other girls, he needs to tell her.
I expect to be exclusive. I said that part of being a gentleman is telling her if there are other girls, but in truth, chivalry is a concept based on monogamy. There was a singular knight courting one girl. If it didn't work out, then he may pursue another, but not until then. This is something I have to work on: being exclusive. I'm not talking about in relationships, that is a given. I am talking about in pursing relationships. I am talking about the talking phase. I am talking about the hanging out phase. All the pre-dating dancing should be exclusive.
I expect---
I don't want to have to fight for his attention. I want to feel wanted. I want to be pursued and I want for him to love the Lord more than he will ever love me. I expect him to guard my heart by stating his intentions clearly. I expect--- to not have to fight.
Sure these expectations are high and somewhat unrealistic, but I will stick to them. I have a hope for the revival of chivalry. After a few months in Houston, I realize that the Southern gentleman still lives, but he's imperfect and despite the fact that he is a "perfect gentleman" he has a tendency to drink too much, make terrible decisions, treat other men with contempt, and swear a little too much for my taste. I understand the chivalry has it's flaws too and my romantic notions of it will probably be crushed into a pulp if I ever actually see full-blown chivalry enacted, nevertheless, I hold out hope that chivalry is not dead. I hold out hope for a knight in shining armor.
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